Hello from the pregnant side

Hello.
It's me.
I was wondering why after ten years you're only coming now?
It's far away and everything,
But you're making tones of money, and surely you could use that?

Hello.
Can you hear me?
I'm drinking Kiwicrush and dreaming about how it could have been
If I'd got tickets to see,
And got to ugly cry while singing ‘Someone Like You’ at your feet

Although the distance between us
Would be several hundred meters

Hello from the pregnant side
I must have spewed a thousand times
And I'm sorry I can't come to your show
Instead I'll just be sitting at home

Hello from the gestating side
When I saw your tour dates I cried
But my body will be too torn apart
My husband doesn't care, it isn’t breaking his heart
Coz he scored.