Christian sex ed

A few Sunday’s ago we had lunch with our Pastor’s. It wasn’t that long after I’d published the kissing blog, so of course we discussed kissing and sex and relationships and topics that I’m sure every family covers over Sunday lunch.

Our Pastor’s also have a young family. They shared that while they could see my point that kissing isn’t always sexual, they’ll be teaching their kids that it is an activity best saved for marriage. They presented a very good argument for this, and I left their house that afternoon with a million thoughts running through my mind.

They’re probably right, we should teach Conrad that kissing isn’t ok. But then what about hugging? Or cuddling during a movie? That stuff very easily leads to kissing, is that bad too? What about holding hands? Where do we draw the line? Argh! This is too hard!! I’m never blogging about this subject again!!!

But, after I’d slept on it, I realised that never blogging about it again would be a very big mistake.

If we get this subject wrong, as evidenced by Roman Catholicism, the consequences can be devastating. Yes, sex and relationships are hard topics to talk about, but that’s exactly why we need to keep talking about them, as extensively as possible.

But, when there are so many different opinions out there, how do we make sure we’re getting it right?

Proverbs 22 verse 6 states “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” We need to make sure we are teaching our kids what the Bible says about sex. Not our opinions, not other people’s opinions, but what the word of God actually says about it. That way when the testosterone kicks in they can’t find a way to argue with it. No one can sass God, not even hormonal sixteen year olds.

We also need to give our young people some credit. 1 Timothy 4 verse 12 says “Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young.”  Yes, teenagers’ frontal lobes aren’t quite finished, but they’re not stupid. They are perfectly capable of controlling themselves if they want to. If they have been well taught about what scripture says about sexual relationships, and have a solid relationship with God, they’ll want to.

There’s a well-known passage in Matthew which, with a few minor modifications, applies perfectly to this situation.

“Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘Should we teach them no kissing?’ or ‘What about cuddling?’ or ‘How do we stop them watching porn?’ It’s normal to question these things, and your heavenly Father knows you need help. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and you’ll figure it out.”

That, and my nursing text books with graphic images of Chlamydia, pretty much sums up my sex education strategy.